--- title: "What Single Motherhood Taught Me About Carrying Too Much" description: "Raising two daughters while balancing corporate leadership and providing for my family taught me to question how much I could carry—and what needed to change." canonical: "https://news.featured.com/what-single-motherhood-taught-me-about-carrying-too-much" published: "2026-10-02T15:09:50.64Z" updated: "2026-10-02T17:06:00.87Z" format: "bylines" beat: "Lifestyle & Family" tags: ["Parenting", "Work-life balance"] author: "Samka Keranovic" editor: "Adrian James" license: "Featured News Republication License 1.0" --- # What Single Motherhood Taught Me About Carrying Too Much _Raising two daughters while balancing corporate leadership and providing for my family taught me to question how much I could carry—and what needed to change._ Bylines · [Lifestyle & Family](https://news.featured.com/beat/lifestyle-family.md) · Edited by Adrian James · 2026-10-02 By Samka Keranovic, Co-Founder, Desert Roots Wellness Since I became a mom in 2004, I felt like I had no choice but to feel like I had to run two households in my head at the same time for years. It felt like I had one tab open for my daughters, and all of their activities and needs & another tab for work. Neither of the “households” ever disappeared from my head. They were always active. Since I was the sole provider for my daughters and myself, my income was the household, and not just the contribution to it. Every time I had to decide whether I had time for something, I always had to ask myself what would happen if I did not have time for this. I felt that I could not even think to myself if I had the capacity, I felt like I needed to find it within me and make it all work, so we have income to live a decent life. Most people will say this was a mindset problem, but it is not, it’s the actual pressure of survival, not just for myself but for lives that I am responsible for, my kids. So many parents, male or female, single or married have faced it and continue to face it while listening to others say how they have to change their mindset. ## **The question that I like to ask nowadays is: What are you carrying that was never yours to begin with?** In my corporate career, I was always the one that everyone depended on. I became the default owner of anything and everything that someone else fell through on, while also everyone looked at me as a leader. To everyone I was the example to follow, almost any female I worked with wanted to be me one day. No one knew the shoes I had to fill every day, until I left corporate and left others in my role. We all know how this all goes. At every household, at every job, there is something that will fall between the cracks, one way or the other and the person that everyone calls “the capable one” will pick it up and fix it, and all the sudden, they are the task owner and it’s their responsibility to carry. I had an employee that religiously assisted other departments, and it was never even noticed in the positive way by any of the peers, but she kept doing it because she thought it mattered, but to the peers it did not. They took it as stepping on their toes, meddling into their departments, but to her what mattered was that the job was done, the tasks had no errors. The problem with overachievers like me is that we do not recognize that being able to help is not the same as being responsible for it. This may sound obvious to many, but for me, it took longer than I wanted to admit that I was one of those people and that I lived that way for so long. During that time, the question kept popping up in my head, and each time it was sooo uncomfortable, but it kept popping up: who should own this task? Because I know if I decide to own it or if someone makes me the owner are two different things. However, what I knew is that each extra unplanned commitment that ended up being thrown my way did not extend the clock, it took time from something else, from my own time. ## **The question I would want every high achiever to ask themselves is: Does your job control your whole life or just your scheduled shift?** Don’t get me wrong, I am not talking negatively about jobs, corporations, or bosses. I am talking about self-abandonment here. I never took my career as something negative, I knew I got paid to solve problems, run organizations and I was good at it. I created a successful career and while I did not let it compete with my mother duties, I later noticed that my kids see me as a responsible professional and would omit to ask me questions or say that they wanted to do an activity because mom seemed preoccupied with work. My own kids noticed before I did that the version of their mom was the dependable one that was always available, always reachable, always handling what others did not or could not. I became a load-bearing human. I can remember one Friday evening where my daughter asked me to watch her play the new video game, of course I said yes, but the whole time my phone would not stop going off. Of course it was work, so in between her breaks I kept checking it and answering text messages, even saying I cannot answer right now because all I wanted to do is be present for her, but I was also afraid what if I miss something at work I would lose my job. I realized later that I was there physically, but I was also in every work conversation. My daughter noticed that, and she was okay with it, but I was not. From that time, I said to myself, it’s enough, there is time and place for everything, and I needed to take ownership of my own life and stop with “what ifs”. ## **I started applying my own advice by asking: What are my daughters learning from my example?** First and foremost, my biggest desire in life is to see my daughters independent and strong. I do want them to understand the importance of respecting others and being true to their commitments and when the commitment does not feel true to heart, to have a boundary and say no, cancel it. However, I also want them to see that their mom with all the commitments in the world, has made time for herself and enjoyed life. So from there, I started asking myself if I would be okay with them taking on all the responsibilities in the world and stressing over them just because I set that as a norm by a pure accident? The answer was NO, so I stopped modeling the behavior that I did not want them to own as they grow into adults. So in January of 2026 I have announced to both of them that I will be stepping down from my corporate role and step into a coaching to teach other high achievers how work-life balance is possible that, family or a relationship balance is possible and manageable too, and how it brings all the positivity in the world. They both watched me start from 0 with the business, and our household did not fall apart in between the transition, we actually got to spend more quality time together, help them both make decisions for themselves and be there to support them too and not just worry about being there for everything and everyone. ## **After going through this one my own, one advice to all high achievers who are ready for a change would be:** I understand that this advice will not be for everyone. I understand some of us are not ready, and some of us do not have the flexibility to try big things, but I promise, trying something so small such as 20 minutes for yourself, even if it’s a cup of coffee in silence, or with the favorite song on, it is a great start. It will actually assist on stressors such as income, bills, groceries, because it will help you cope better, think better, and decide better. I also challenge you today to think about one thing at work, home, or a relationship that you always say yes too because you are afraid to say no, and have that conversation, tell them what you actually feel, and why you feel obligated. You will be surprised of the answer on the other side, and you will be released from, at least from this one thing, and from responsibility that you probably put on yourself to carry it. It just takes one conversation, even if it’s a tough one to resolve so much tension, so much confusion and allows us to have a work-life balance, or a balance in a relationship where we feel worthy and supported. ## About the author **Samka Keranovic, Co-Founder, Desert Roots Wellness** [Author page](https://news.featured.com/authors/samka-keranovic-92712.md) Samka Keranovic is the Co-Founder at Desert Roots Wellness. She brings 16 years of coaching experience and over two decades of corporate leadership to helping high-achieving professionals overcome burnout, build boundaries, and strengthen self-trust. Her approach blends neuroscience-informed coaching with practical strategies to help clients break patterns of people-pleasing, reconnect with themselves, and create sustainable success without sacrificing their well-being. --- Read the full story at https://news.featured.com/what-single-motherhood-taught-me-about-carrying-too-much Free to read, quote and cite with a link. 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